The common reaction for most men when they discover that their wife or girlfriend or whatever was taken advantage of by another man is anger, and consequently violence, towards that man. They want to attack or otherwise physically harm that person. I was watching a movie, Pushing Tin, when I came across what I think is a much more practical and effective tactic: a psychological attack. Here’s the example from the movie. You should probably know that Nick slept with Russell’s wife.

Russell Bell: I was a little boy when my grandfather told me if you ever want to sleep at night don’t marry a young beautiful woman. I did. I’m a 40 year old man. I married a beautiful nineteen year old girl. I’ve learned to accept certain things. I know the dangers of it. I’ve also been on the other side. I’ve been the one following the little pink panties down the hallway. It’s torturous. We’re men. We can’t help it.
Nick Falzone: It’s not fair.
Russell: It’s a huge burden on us.
Nick: Jesus, you’re being incredible about this, Bell. I mean amazing. Really.
Russell: You’re married to a really beautiful woman yourself. You should understand.
Nick: Connie?
Russell: Yeah, Connie. She’s gorgeous. My God she’s gorgeous. You must go crazy when men gawk at her.
Nick: mmhmm
Russell: If this happened to you, if you were in this situation, you’d understand. You might not like it, but you’d understand.
Nick: I don’t think I would.
Russell: You might be surprised.
Nick: I really don’t think I would.
Russell: Human beings can tolerate a lot of pain. You never know ’til it happens.

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