Tag Archive for 'funny'

The leanest of them all!

Yah, that’s right. Colorado wins:

http://strangemaps.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/obesitystates.jpg

I say it’s because of all of the Ethiopian restaurants around here.

From here.

State Pride

I would venture that people think there’s something unique about their state that may not really be that unique. “We have THE WORST or THE MOST AGGRESSIVE drivers here.” Or the one I want to talk about today: “Our weather is THE MOST unpredictable — it’s sunny in the morning and snowing at night!”

I lived in Michigan for 28.75 of my 29 years. I thought the weather in Michigan was very odd. People blamed it on being surrounded by lakes. It would be 30 degrees and 80 degrees in the same day with sun, clouds, rain and snow at almost the same time. I thought that was a claim to fame for Michigan. When I traveled, I would exclaim, “You don’t know anything! Michigan weather is craAaAAzy!!” But I’m not so sure anymore.

Colorado weather is as unpredictable as Michigan’s. I’ve experienced it go from mild and sunny to freezing and snowing in an hour. It’s windy and cold when you get home and then sunny and sweaty hot when you go back out a few minutes later with a jacket on. Wednesday it was 83 degrees. Wednesday night it got down to the 30s and snowed by morning. The high on Thursday was 43 degrees.

It’s just as crazy as Michigan. I can’t imagine Colorado and Michigan are unique. Are there just a few areas that have unpredictable weather? Or do all states claim they do and think it’s unique to them?

Update: The “Michigan Left”! There’s another thing that I’m sure doesn’t happen in just Michigan. It’s where you have to turn right and then U-turn to make a left turn.

Water with Calories

My water has less calories than your water. You have to do 200 extra sit ups to burn off the extra calories in your water. You’re stupid. I’m smart. WTF. The commercials for the flavored water with hundreds of calories vs the flavored water that only has forty calories are silly. DRINK REGULAR WATER. Imagine how smart you’ll be then.

Kumatron

I work from home now (which is good and bad, but that’s a different story). Denver is very dry. And winter is very dry. And I don’t think our furnace has any humidifying capability. So the air in the house is almost always very dry. This results in a lot of static shocks. I’m very conscious around computers and things, and I discharge before I start working (typically by touching a screw in a light switch panel). Unfortunately, my dogs don’t understand why their nose gets shocks randomly when they sniff things around the house. They also don’t realize that it’s bad for computers. This results in Kuma shuffling his feet around the house and rolling around on the carpet and then heading for my desk. I can hear the static crackling on his hair. Then he goes in for the sniff on my keyboard tray and *ZAP*. He recoils and the shock goes into my tray and my keyboard and makes it stop working. I have to unplug and plug it back in to make it work again. Good stuff.

Lunar Eclipse

There was a lunar eclipse last night. Denver gets 300 sunny days per year, but on the night of the Lunar Eclipse that saved Christopher Columbus, the sky is filled with clouds. Go figure. I was going to use Chris’s trick to convince the neighbor kid to give me his bike. But instead I just looked like a fool standing out there pointing and saying, “No, really. It’s red behind there. Give me your bike.”





:)